I create "themes" not "resolutions" for the New Year

For the past three years, I have approached creating my new year's resolutions a little differently than normal. Instead of creating only specific goals and having a tunnel vision of what I want to achieve for that year, I started implementing a "themes" idea that could percolate from year to year.

The results? The themes have allowed to create more continuity in my life - I don't have the pressure to have to complete everything by December 31st. I am now able to see goals not as the final destinations, but as processes to becoming someone I want to be. It has also allowed me greater flexibility in adjusting my goals so that I can reach towards a better vision.

How does it work? Let me show you:

In 2017, I sought out to concentrate and work on my actions, behaviors, goals, thoughts, and attitudes in four areas:

(1) Change: I wanted to become used to changes in my life (it seems like a most basic idea, but man, it's hard for me). I wanted to have better control of my stress (for my mental health). And I wanted to feel comfortable with not being in control.

I sought to manage my actions and thoughts (especially my thoughts!) to understand how to better deal with changes not only when big decisions happened but on every little thing I did everyday. The little things really do add up.

(2) Relationships: Society seeks for us to prepare very well for our vocation or job, but we leave our relationships to chance. I wanted to understand what was really important in my life, so I sought to better understand the people who are a part of it.

(3) Ownership: I wanted to let go of expectations and start owning (or rather, having the responsibility of) the direction of my own life rather than leaving it to the drawn-out-path. This also meant understanding my fears of failure and my lack of confidence in who I was. This one was hard for me.

(4) Wonder: Even among all the chaos of the world and the goals I had set to do, I wanted to maintain that curiosity and drive to explore the world - to know there is still so much to learn. This taught me to be grateful and appreciative of every moment in my life.

As the 2018 year came around, I felt very different and happy. For each of four "themes", I had achieved certain milestones which I wrote down afterwards. This progress swiftly led me to creating the themes for the 2018 year:

(1) Connecting: I know who I want to be surrounded by. I know the kind of relationships I want. And that is what I seek to attract.

"I love connecting with people who have been through the fire and come out stronger and wiser. Using their experiences to inspire and empower others. Those are my people" - Steve Maraboli

(2) Letting go: Becoming more in-tune with your intuition and the workings of God requires that we open our eyes. Sometimes this requires that we give up things we think are good but are hurting us or keeping us back so that we can reach for better things. Sometimes it simply means looking elsewhere.

"Stay away from people, things, and places that make you feel you are hard to love."

(3) Embracing the good: There is always something (something good!) to be learned from every experience. That is what I sought to learn how to do.

"Life will change. Growth is optional. Choose wisely."

(4) Seeking: This one goes back to the idea represented in this blog - don't become too comfortable with who you are and where you are. Always keep your eyes open for that next turn to continue your growth. There is no end, but rather steps towards our next destination.

"Just because you found God doesn't mean you should stop seeking him."

So, what are my themes for this year, 2019? I feel the past two years have allowed me to gain a greater awareness of who I am and where I am going. As a result, this year I hope to continue implementing all that I have learned from the past and start embracing a more adventurous path. It will feel different, but I am eager for what is to come.

The following are my themes for the 2019 year:

(1) Risk: This stems from the idea of letting go and seeking to embrace new paths and ideas. I am at a point in my life where I want to take action now. I feel very much empowered to create more in my life.

(2) Adventure: I have decided to start updating my mindset to thinking about experiences (any experience) as adventures in my life. Instead of trying to concentrate on how to piece the puzzle pieces together all the time, I am learning to create my own puzzle adventure.

(3) Learning: I am attempting to embrace new opportunities that I don't know how to handle. I want to have a learning mindset this year that will help me in many transitions, changes, and new experiences so that I can move with more flexibility and curiosity. I also want to feel able to ask and seek for help as I learn to navigate new things.

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Phew! There you have it, folks! It has been a crazy ride these last two years and I am looking forward to what 2019 will bring.

My new year's resolutions started in 2017 and I am still going. They are still pushing me not because I am simply doing things to mark them off, but because I am seeking to become someone through the actions that I take.

Those are my type of sustainable resolutions.

What about you? How has your 2019 been going so far? Let me know if you would like help or want to talk - I would love to hear from you! A coach is always a great listening ear and support buddy.

Trust the process. Live the commitment